Space for Rent...

The scatterboard blog has gone from this place. and now so should you. Update your bookmarks to:

www.quiteenjoy.wordpress.com

toodles x

Cycles that make you go BANG

Discovered in a quaint little shop in Kangroo vally: This sign boasts that "Enfield cycles" are "made like a gun". Don't think that would make me more enclined to sit on one- let alone travel at 100 miles an hour on one.


- Posted by Brown on the move

Cultural Diffirences

I'm currently visiting the sunny shores of Australia. It's the little
things here that make you realise you are a long way from home. Take
for example this prize item found in a club casio (or Pokey area). In
England we would have a Wooden wine rack- here you get a pigs arse.
Class act.

Beyond our (my) control.

Ok so I'm currently nearly 3 weeks behind on my toneless reviews. Circumstances being the bitch that they are have led me to suspend my ranting reviewing until a later date. Currently I'm on the shores of Australia with an old football named Wilson for company. When I am back on the shores of Blighty the reviews will return with gusto...actually I could write some on the plane couldn't I? Yes...I'll do that.

....You still here?

Retro-fit.

Well here's something you don't see every day...or in fact for 20 years. A very clever person has gone and re-done the original Super Mario Brothers (from the NES) with some alternate nintendo characters for you to play with. Kudos fella...kudos.

you can play it here:

http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/534416

Tone-less Week#2

Week#2

The Black Keys

Attack and Release

All you ever wanted

If you pay enough attention to the lyrics with this one then it may come across as a rather cheery beat to slash your wrists to. That is until a massive drop comes in near the end to remind you that life aint so bad and you really should give milk another try...(?) As this was supposed to be a voyage of self righteousness, with me being totally justified in hating everything modern musicians can throw at me, I have to confess- this one...she’s nice.

I Got Mine

Ooooh I do like a tasty beat and this one drops you right in it. I think if there was ever a decent contender to the theme from “The Wire” then this is it. Feels very cop show- in fact behind the deliberately messy electric guitar and thuds you can almost see the gritty montage; Picturing all your favorite TV cops in various sages of a “bust” and in saturated shades of red and blue. Excuse me while I grab a gun. Thats better.

Strange Times

They do love a beat- got to admire that. I don’t even care that I can’t understand what they are saying- which as you should have guessed by now is one of my greatest bug-bears (which in itself is a horrifying creature). I can actually feel myself physically nodding my head to this one and, if placed in the right environment, may be forced to stand and wave one arm in the air as if that gesture would mean something to someone somewhere. A secret handshake into the world of cool that has managed to allude me for most of my life. Not that I’m that concerned. I’m quite happy sitting here behind my tinted glass window of success and superiority- listening to this tune. Again please.

Psychotic Girl

This is how i imagine a cross between “Twin Peaks” and a Western would sound. This soul penetrating tune would surely be playing behind the counter of every store in “Twin Dunes” -I reckon thats what they would call it as well- and I’ve got first dibs on that name. Every time I hear the chorus I imagine some bewildered fellow walking in slow motion past a shop window with an old woman eating spiders behind it. Then again I have untold issues. Eerie and compelling to listen to is this one...it has also made me fond of backwards sentences and the idea of a spin off to “Twin Peaks”. Not bad work...for a tune.

Lies

No no no no no- it was going so well boys. We have sacrificed pace and instruments for audibility of lyrics here. Call me a hypocrite but this is a sacrifice to far- given the feel of the rest of the album. I can understand the need for variety on an album- This one is slower, like a decent to madness after a massive ice cream headache, but something just doesn’t fit. The thuds aren't helping said headache either. Depressing. He wants to die without pain, I want to eat another ice cream.

Remember when (Sides A+ B)

Don’t try and sneak another bloody track review out of me just by splitting a track into an A and B side. Hitler tried that. Didn’t fly for him, won’t fly for you Boy-o! Bit of a subdued one this one, not terrible but wouldn’t want it played at my party if you get my drift. One to listen to while outside. One of those songs that kind of gets absorbed rather than listened to. In fact I’ve written half this review without realizing it was playing.

The B side is an astonishing return to form- welcome back boys, where have you been? Good old beat- maybe this is that party version that I was longing for? Well maybe not longing, I mean I only mentioned the party a paragraph ago and it’s not like it was consuming my life. Who are you to judge anyway? See- this is what this song is capable of. It is Attitude in audible form, cue 90’s montage of things getting smashed! Hell yeah!

Same old thing

...Is anything but. This would be track 2 on my fantastical party mix. Get it started with the right over tone. It reminds me so much of another tune I’ve heard but being musically retarded I couldn’t even begin to describe to you which one it is...I guess “you know, the one with the guitar” isn’t going to cut it, is it? Rage against the machine! Thats the one- its got the same sort of feel- just with a very different vocal styling, but i guarantee you- start screaming over the top of the instrumental of this and it would be like Rage are in the room with you...eating your custard creams and stealing your buss fare.

So He Won’t Break

...Yep. I like it. Has the feel of a Cohen Brothers film. In fact I can imagine it in “the Big Lebowski” quite nicely. Would fit well with another bowling sued o dream like sequence...because one is never enough. Very western feel to it. Lovely. Word. Sup.

Oceans And Streams

Is it me or does this one change speed throughout? Like a tape recorder running out of batteries. Could be my imagination - or the fall but it feels like thats what it’s doing. Im in no way saying that in a negative way. Just as a mater of observation. It’s getting difficult to come up with different ways to praise these songs- they certainly seem to be hitting the right spot with me. Old meets...well old really. Bar tunes I guess you would say- but film bar tunes. Where you know it’s not actually playing in the bar- its just there to set the mood that “this is a bar and someone important is going to smash another important guy in the face quite soon”. 

 Things Aint Like They Used To Be

Movie Credits time! As I said in the last review there has to be a song that would fit well with the closing credits of a film- and this is it. Only in this film all the characters in it would have been diagnosed with some fatal illness or been wiped out in a town fire at the end. The title says it all...Things aint like they used to be...you used to be alive.

Album sum up

Well this has been an interesting one. Tapping into my inner soft spot for old time american montage music and then sealing the hole behind using salt with a couple of slit your wrist specials. All in all though I like their style. You could do worse than take a leaf out of the Black Keys book, modern music, as their pages are ripe with reach lesions to be learned in song writing and musical accomplishment. Apart from pages 9-11 which have poo on them.

Positives

• Great Beats
• Catchy “bob you head” tunes.
• Feel “Like a man” while listening.

Negatives

• Lies.
• Style can wander
• Faint whiff of cheese.

Overall

8 / 10

Tone-less Week#1

The Arcade Fire

Funeral

Neighborhood#1 (Tunnels)

Looking at the track listing there seems to be a lot of these “Neighborhood) tracks. As i have no idea as to what they refer I shall ignore them as only an ignorant English man can and assume that the part in brackets should be the actual track title. As a starter for 10 its not half bad. Nice beat with a good build. Seems to house the number one problem I have with music- not being able to understand a damn word in the song. They may as well be moaning “cats on fire” at various pitches and tempos and I’d be none the wiser. Still, nice tune carries it though- anyone finds and instrumental version give me a nod and I’ll give it a 9/10.

Neighborhood#2 (Laika)

“Second verse same as the first”. Again must be in Russian as I don’t understand a word of it- apart from someone telling “Alex that he can do It”. As much as I firmly believe in “Alex” and his ability to “do it” I could have sworn the track title was “Laika”..where’s he/she then? Is she the one controlling the choir of drowning cats in the background. Beats are good though- theres a tune behind that curtain of noise somewhere.

Une Année Sans Lumière

You know I could go on forever about how i can’t understand them so lets just take that as a given until I announce otherwise. Got to hand it to them the tune is solid- as with the other two. This is more relaxed- something you’d laze outside on a sunny day listening to, thinking how great it is to have legs...or similar thoughts. Reminds me a little bit of the Smiths...but that could be because i have jam in my ears... and a broken CD player.

Hold the phone- someones let the guitarist out of the shackles of repression, he decides to spark up at the end of the tune completely altering it’s tone. I can accept that...But I don’t care for it. Back in your cage boy, I was enjoying my thoughts.

Neighborhood #3 (Power Out)

Well well...I hate to throw Linken Park allegations at anyone...so i wont. A heavier outing in this track. Kind of sounds like some one threw extra instruments at Kings of Leon. Not bad though. I actually managed to hear “Power out” somewhere in the dark so at least we’ve got an association with the track name in this one. Kudos. I picture myself in an over thought out dance hall in some hollywood film when I’m listening it it. Could be because it has that kind of beat thats usually heard if you strip a tune of all its Mid tones- or it could be because I see Green and blue flashing lights. Both concern me.

Neighborhood #4 (7 Kettles)

Starts well with the classic “Fret slip” as i call it- when you can hear the guitarist change chords. Love a bit of that- feels more real. A more melodic feel- something that wouldn’t be out of place in an indie film about love and beaches. No mention of Kettles (only slight hints at watched pots never boiling) but still- none to shabby. Like it.

Crown Of Love

We have a winner! Well in terms of I can understand most of the lyrics! It really does add something you know. Not hearing what they’re saying is like watching couples on Trisha- you know they must understand each other, but to you they are just an irritating waste of skin and teeth that should be locked in a box. Wouldn’t recommend this one if you’ve just broken up with someone and are feeling a little on edge. It will likely pick you up in it’s thin whispery arms and drop you firmly over the side, replacing any jagged rocks at the bottom with spikes made of marble. That is until it goes all disco at the end. Then you can just bob and forget the cliff was even there.

Wake Up

Roll Credits. There has to be at least one track on most albums that can be described as their “Movie credits” one. Tough one to pick the film it would run at the end of. I can’t see it on Saving private Ryan but it could fit Armageddon. Not bad. Bit shouty in parts, but who cares; If all you are doing is looking at squillions of names whizzing past- thinking who came up with the term “best boy” and was he actually any good?  Favorite so far.

Haiti

Very dreamy. Its been playing in the background and I forgot what I was supposed to be doing. If there was a soundtrack to my Brain then this may well come close. It blended so seamlessly into my own inherent “Brain On Hold” music that I hardly noticed it playing. When i did eventually smack myself out of my music educed coma I enjoyed what I heard. But by then I was already into the next track...

Rebellion (Lies)

Slight criticism; one sentence does not a chorus make. As lovely as the statements “every time you close your eyes” and “underneath the covers” are, the repetition makes them sound similar to a nematic drill sparking up at 5AM after a victory over a rather vicious case of insomnia 10 minutes previously. Next.

In The Back Seat

Is it telling that I pre-judged the content of this song? “Sleeping in my car” by Roxette came immediately to mind. I must say I judged wrong. I have no idea what it’s about but its nice. The female vocal lead knows he stuff- still cant talk in English though but I’ve long since let that slide in this album. Swelling strings will take you back to your garden thinking about legs again, but this time it’s probably in the rain...in slow motion...with something aflame in the background. Lovely tune this one. Guitarists get a bit keen now and then but hey, you’ve payed them and made them come to practice- may as well use them eh?

Album Sum Up

The term “Mixed bag” is batted around far to readily and seems like a cheap way out...but I’m all for saving pennies so thats exactly what I’ll call this album. Or varied. Yes, I prefer varied. 

Positives:

: It’s not one of those albums where all the tracks sound like the same one split with chapter markers and a bit of a pause.

: Great backing tunes, Heavy and light catered for.

Negatives:

: Could only understand about 10 words in the whole albums lyrics. That is the equivalent to a Spot the dog: lift the flaps book. In fact that may be the lyric sheet.

Overall

7 / 10